UPDATE #11: Silver Year

Dear, Online Friends.

How's life? I hope everything's going the right way, and you're all in good shape! It has apparently been 4 years already, huh? There are so many things to update, that I don't even know where and how to start. The Syifa on this Blogspot's last post wouldn't even believe what followed after that. 

My beloved friends, I've had a lot of ups and downs in the last 4 years. However, all I can think of as I'm writing this is that I should be proud of myself for being able to get through everything. A reminder as well to never forget to give myself a pat in the back, once in awhile. 

In this post, I will not go into details as it would be too long. But if it's possible, I might try finding the time to reactivate this blog as my online diary - to pour my thoughts and emotions. Nowadays, I suppose people don't read/use Blogspot anymore, so I guess it's safe, haha! Okay, here are the highlights:

2020:

• Covid-19: The pandemic that broke out around December 2019, that put the world in such a strange state, that took away so many lives across the globe, that detained everyone from going out of home, that changed the way people live. 
• I graduated with a Bachelor of Civil Engineering from Institut Teknologi Bandung - online, no ceremonial graduation, but I was happy to celebrate it with my family at home!
• My dad passed away. My 2020 ended here.

2021:

• I bounced back after my dad's passing, trying to accept that a big part of my heart is now empty. But I told myself to keep going on so that I could take care of my dearest mom and brother. 
• I struggled to find a job. I worked for a few months as my professor's assistant for a few project related to sustainable transportation system. My Bachelor's thesis topic led me to this point. I became a transport geek.
• I broke up with my long-time boyfriend. I met two guys - one didn't work out, one I let go. He got a new girl. But somehow we got back together, and we thought, "Was it destiny?" (the answer is in 2023)
• I got accepted into an NGO's internship program - In early 2021, I applied for the intern position; I failed 3 times, and got accepted as a Transport Intern on my fourth attempt. I remember clearly I started working on June 16, 2022. Let's see what happens 8 months later in 2022.

2022:

• I got a job - a meaningful job that I share the same vision with. This is what follows my internship period. I was really sure that this is where I wanted to be. The working environment has been helping me grow, keeping me curious, and pushing me to strive for the best. I have been given the opportunity to make impactful changes to the city, in terms of mobility. Duh, I won't stop if I don't end this part here!
• I worked on 2 publications, one was a small research on cycling + one was a roadmap made for the Government of Jakarta
• I made a stronger bond than ever with my mom. We laugh, we have inside jokes, we fight - I even finally built the courage to confide to my mom.

2023:

• I turned 25, hence the title! Hahaha!
• I broke up with him, again. But this time, I have decided I won't go back and that it's really for good. It is too painful to talk about it - I have such mixed feelings, but dominantly sad and sorry.
• Going abroad solo for the first time! I still cannot believe that I actually paid for everything. I'm going to Manila for 3 days this July, to watch Ryujin Nippon (Japanese Men's Volleyball Team) competing at the Volleyball Nations League! Actually, this should also be in my 2022 highlight: finding a new source of happiness.

Well, I think that's about it for now. Let's just hope that I can find the time to write in detail about these highlights, or maybe my thoughts on work! Haha. 

I have to sleep, it's 2:23 in the morning, and I have to go at like 5:15 am for a survey starting at 7 am in South Jakarta. I'm feeling a bit of self-doubt and sadness lately and staying late has somehow been the way I cope with that. But, quoting my dear friends' sentence, that I always receive everyday at the office:

"Kamu harus selalu semangat, Syifa!"

She's right, I should! I will close this with positive affirmations for myself:

• I will become an active mobility and urban development specialist that people will look up and refer to 
• I will finish all my work in high quality
• I will love and take care of myself 
• I will be healthy, I won't catch any serious illness
• Everything will turn out okay

Good night!